Matt Kenyon 08082013

Image: The Guardian

Ladies and gents, this blog presents
The finest M.E.P. Yorkshire offers
A man who thinks our government
Loves nowt more than to rid its coffers

Mr. Bloom by name (bloomer by nature)
Has a the history of nasty bungles
He says that all our charity goes
To the land of bongo jungles

Or rather “bongo bongo land”
Was the insulting phrase he said
He cares not for 21st century
But old Imperialistic Britain instead

He thinks little of poor African countries
And if he thought before he speaks
He’d know the duty of the strong
Is to help protect the weak

IF YOU SAVE ONE LIFE, YOU SAVE THE WORLD
An ethos he does not follow
He says that “charity begins at home”
But these words are surely hollow

If “bongo bongo…” was just for show
It failed to raise a ‘laff’
One can picture the very thought he had
When he made his “bongo” gaffe:

Short black men in long grass skirts
Banging a bongo drum
Well get this: before the Romans came
His own ancestors lived in slum

Yes mud huts here were all the rage
As Britain was one big tribe
Godfrey Bloom should think of this
Before he makes a racist jibe

He’s “standing up for ordinary people”
Spoken verily like a fool
So are we rightly to assume
That his people went not to school?

He was once ejected from parliament
For his offensive nazi phrase
And sexist comments on womenfolk
Haven’t exactly earned him praise

Aeons ago, conquerors arrived
The people of Africa were their prey
If they and their lands weren’t raped and pillaged
Would they still need or help today?

“A scar on the conscience of the world”
Is how Africa was once described
On the tombstone of Godfrey’s political career
Something similar will be inscribed